Community Takes Cultivating

Mar 23

Guest Blog by Natalie

Natalie is a nurse by profession, but her heart for health goes far beyond what you’ll find in a clinic. She deeply values a whole-person approach to wellness, caring for the body, mind, and soul in ways that are both practical and rooted in everyday life.

She’s the mother of two little ones, an avid sourdough baker, and a fellow Minnesota mama who knows the beauty and the chaos of raising a family while trying to live intentionally. I’ve always appreciated the way Natalie brings both knowledge and humility to the conversation, blending medical understanding with a love for natural rhythms, nourishing food, and simple living.

I don’t know about you, but I entered motherhood with lots of expectations. But, maybe not the kind of expectations you would expect.

I knew sleep would be sparse, breastfeeding could be tricky, and our marriage would shift. I knew that recovery would be hard, and that most days I’d just be winging it and throwing up a prayer with my third cup of coffee in hand before 11:00am.

I also knew that all of a sudden I would be able to relate to a whole new, big group of people - MOMS. And I was so excited! Plus, I figured that since they all knew what it was like to be a lonely, exhausted, overwhelmed first time mom they would reach out, invite me to play dates, send me encouraging texts, and finally be the group of friends I had been praying for. Right? Wrong.

Instead I was met with feelings of inferiority and when I mustered up an ounce of courage to make the first move I was met with “Sorry, I don’t have time. Maybe in a few months,” or just no response at all.

So, was it me? Did people just not like me?

Might I add that during this time I decided to do an in depth devotional that helped you seek out your deepest fear and find ways to conquer it in faith. And you want to know what mine was? Rejection. Nothing like realizing that in the midst of lots of new found rejection.

Yeah, can’t say I’d recommend doing Bible studies like that during the first few months of post partum.

Now, while I did (and still do) have an amazingly supportive and involved husband, a loving extended family, and received a few texts here and there. I wanted friends. Like real friends.

Friends with meaning, true connection and relatability. Friends who I could genuinely do life with, and our families could grow up together while challenging each other to pursue Jesus in all that life throws our way.

I thought that since I would now “belong” in the community of motherhood that the community would find me. But, in reality, I had to find it.

I had to be the one to make the first move. Send the text. Plan the play date. And sheepishly walk over to and try to converse with the moms at church.

I had to cultivate and create the community that I wanted. And you know what, I still have to.

When I had my second child, I thought that maybe it would be a little better this time. Maybe, just maybe I’d have to do a little less of the inviting and would finally be the invited.

But, that didn’t happen. And that’s ok.

Over time, it’s gotten easier.

I feel less awkward sending the random text. I genuinely feel my heart fill with glee and gratitude as I prepare my home to host. And you know that sense of heart skipping a beat, happy joy you feel when you get an invite to something? Well, there’s a whole lot of joy found in being that sense of joy for someone else.

Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there, Mama. Your age and the number of and ages of your children do not make you inferior to mamas a little farther down the road. (But, do I still struggle with an inferiority complex? Sure do! But, refining doesn’t happen overnight, friend.)

If you want community, be bold enough to cultivate it yourself. Pray for boldness and opportunities to connect and reach out.

In order to harvest you got to plant seeds. And a whole lot of them.